Dear Hollywood: Vol. 7


Dear Hollywood,
I haven’t really raised issue with you as of late, but lately I feel like you are reaching more than ever to hook a good story. I’m all for a juicy tidbit, don’t get me wrong, but it seems like a new trend for you is to label dinner dates as relationship headliners/reunifications. For starters, a few days ago when Jennifer Lawrence was spotted having dinner with former fling Chris Martin, the Internet went abuzz with excitement over the rekindling of their relationship. (See Photo).


Really?! I mean, it looks pretty innocent to me. It’s not like they’re sipping champagne with linked arms or spoon feeding creme brûlée to one another. There was no evidence there was any kind of romantic contact, or anything that could be construed as such. I don’t get it. Slow news day? I mean, sometimes a dinner is probably just a dinner.

Same story, different characters: Katy Perry was spotted having dinner with ex John Mayer, so obviously they are again in a committed relationship with one another, right?!


Now, I’m all for a Katy-John reunion as much as the next person, but I don’t think one casual dinner is reason to start ringing wedding bells. Of course, no reps of any of the parties mentioned have even nodded to any truth regarding rekindled romances, but maybe, just maybe, we shan’t make big deals out of celebrities eating food together. They too get hungry, after all.

On a similar page, I would also like to take a moment to address the fact that you, Hollywood, went absolutely nutso a few weeks ago declaring that Taylor Swift was dating Matt Healy of the band The 1975.

Your evidence?? Well, Taylor was seen at not one, but two, count them, 2, 1975 shows recently. That means they’re dating?!! Why did no one tell me that I too have been having an extramarital romp with the lad, since I too have been in attendance at several shows. I have a picture of myself and Mr. Healy publicly displayed on Facebook and Instagram…scandalous. Taylor’s reps have, for the record, stated she is happily single, but hey, not even I could fault her if she did have herself a little Healy hook up.

So, in short, unless John knocks up Katy over a selection of dim sum, we should probably not speculate so incredibly in depth about their relationship status. Just a thought.


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