Dear Hollywood: vol. 4

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  Dear Hollywood,

Twice in one week?!? So many questions in need of answers. You did, however, finally confirm that Gosling did knock up Mendes, resulting in a sky rocket of sales of Ben and Jerry’s and Tollhouse cookie dough amongst the general female population of the United States. Nevermind how she managed to make it a full 7 months into her pregnancy before public confirmation, but Mendes is now unfortunately finding herself quite loathed on social media. Now, by no means am I climbing aboard the I-Hate-Eva bandwagon. I believe pregnancy and motherhood is a beautiful thing, so to Eva, overall, I am ambivalent. This is about Ryan and his failure to work things out with Rachel McAdams, and his further failure to truly live up to all of the Hey Girl memes he so gallantly inspired. Yes Ryan, my yoga pants are adorable, I do need help holding my stencil in place, and yes, I do want to show you everything I pinned on Pinterest today. Oh Ryan. But let’s be optimistic you guys, he has not, to our knowledge, put a ring on it.

Speaking of putting a ring on it…what up with the rumored secret marriage of Bradley Cooper and Suki Waterhouse?!!! Just as with Mr. Gosling, I have long been a smitten kitten over Mr. Cooper. If anyone is being betrothed to the man it needs to be Jennifer Lawrence, dammit!! Apparently Bradley and Suki have been spotted (and naturally, photographed) out and about wearing matching bands on their left ring fingers. I mean, if you’re not legally bound in holy matrimony you have to realize you are causing quite the public outcry. Is this a sick joke?! Cooper camp, shed some light here.

Sincerely,

The girl distracting herself from today’s reality and who may be partially responsible for that increase in  Tollhouse sales; but hey, it’s Friday.

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